Driving, Applesauce, & A Book!

A lot has happened in the last week.  I am not sure where to begin.   

This morning I went to Eastview Church in Bloomington Normal, Illinois. However this morning I didn't feel like going to church.   To be honest I didn't feel like doing anything.   However I forced myself to go to church and I am glad I did.   I've felt little energy today, though I don't feel like "Blah".   I also took an online test in Biology tonight and I failed, which I'm not too thrilled about. 

Yesterday my two brothers, David and Jonathan, and one of my grandma's (Carol) and myself went out for brunch at Woody's in Groveland, since Jonathan is back in the area for a wedding.    I was thrilled to be able to get together as all four of us!    I then ran a few errands and then stopped at Mission Mart (a thrift shop) and dropped off just about all the remaining "stuff" of mine that didn't sell on the garage sale - yes including my clothes as I mentioned in an earlier post.   I felt the permission to keep two full pairs of clothes, and I'm excited to see how God will use that to teach me and grow me.    I know that it will likely be used as a testimony of some amazing things God has done in my life.   

This past week has been a bit busy, but all my homework has gotten done.  I am thankful for that.   I do have a lot more on my plate now though.    I have fifteen days to write a persuasive speech (continuing my informative speech on the same topic) on why the United States of America should get rid of the penny.  This is a standpoint that the Canadian's convinced me of just by experience.  My ICC Composition Term paper was entirely on why the United States of America should keep the penny.   Yes I am still a penny lover, and yes I still love to collect coins, but I do believe it would be better to get rid of the penny. 

In other news in my life, I have started to . . .  well before I get to that, let me first tell this story.    Last Sunday, I was planning to go to church with my grandma Baurer, as I was at her house at the time.   However I had no clear direction where God wanted me to go.   In asking Him prior to Sunday, I had felt that He said that I could go with her to church, however I felt that there was something else He had in mind.  He didn't tell me until about five minutes before I left for church - I had told my grandma ahead of time that if I feel God leading me else where I will follow and she was supportive of that.    Now you may say, "wow, only five minutes before?" Yes that is a short time but it is more in advance than the prior week where He told me while I was on the road to church that He wanted me somewhere else. 

*as a note, I have not found a church to settle in yet.  I am still praying about it and taking it to God.  He has been directing me to a number of different churches and thus far that is still the case.  It's possible that He may want me to take the current season I am in and attend His Church in numerous buildings.   I look forward to whatever He may lead me to and wherever I am led I will follow. 

Anyways I felt Him directing me last Sunday to go to Heartland.  I had asked Him if that was the school or a church (my college's name is Heartland Community College) and He just replied with "go to Heartland."   So I headed to the school.   On the way I started playing some of Koinonia's podcast sermons.   And I was really Glad I did.  After I arrived at heartland I listened to the rest of the sermon I was on, God took me out for a fun, long, and beautiful drive all around in the country.  All the while I was listening to Koinonia's podcasts.    They blessed me a lot and I am very thankful that I had this experience.   

Later, after supper, I felt that I needed to take a drive with God, I felt that He wanted to talk to me while I was truly alone with Him.  (This has happened a lot before, so this wasn't a new thing to me).  So I told Steve and Renee (my aunt and uncle who I am staying with) that I was going out for a drive and I didn't know when I would be back.   Then I left.     God took me out and about.  He looped me all the way around Bloomington Normal and then back onto the freeway.   The freeway was headed towards Chicago.  I didn't think I was going to go that far north, so I told God, I will keep going straight until you tell me to get off.   God accepted that.   I didn't get off until the freeway was in downtown Chicago.   I had a wonderful time with God and I even re-listened to some of the podcasts I head listened to earlier.   I had some good talks with God and just some good quality time driving with Him.   He took me to the beach of Lake Michigan with huge beautiful bright moon shining on the smooth water.  It was beautiful.  Also, earlier in the night the sky was lit up with a huge harvest moon, it was so beautiful.   Then He took me on a drive in and out through country and towns.   Finally around 2:00am I pulled into the parking lot of a Holiday Inn somewhere between Chicago and Rockford.   I believe I fell asleep around 2:10am in my car.   I asked God to bless me with sleep as I had an early morning.  He did just that.  I woke up at about 5:20am - just over three hours later, and headed back to the Schlipf's.   Why did I head back so early?  Because Monday was 'The Big Day' at the Schlipf's, it was Applesauce Day! 

So I was able to make it back to the Schlipf's in good time (about a 2.5 hour drive), and do some more cleaning out of the garage left over from the garage sale.    Then I headed inside around 8:30am to help with the applesauce.   Grandma Baurer came over to help as she also wanted some of the apple sauce.   With well over 4 bushels of large apples, we worked all morning cutting, soaking, heating, softening, mashing, mixing, pouring, and finally bagging nearly 60 quarts (almost 55 liters) of homemade applesauce.    It was a lot of work, but I found it fun.   

Now, back to the story that I had started but then didn't say because I wanted to tell you this story.    While I was on the drive one thing God shared with me is something that I've felt on my heart of a long while.   In fact it is something that has been on the back of my mind for years, but I felt as though God brought it forward and asked me to start writing a book.   So, I have started writing a book.   I don't expect this to be a long book nor do I expect it to be amazing.  However I know that I have felt the urging to to it for a long time and now that the door has opened I will jump into it.   I know that it will take lots of time and thought and prayer, but I am going to go for that.  The book will be about God: about who He is, and what He has shown me, told me, revealed to me, and when He___________ (fill in the blank).    I've written a short intro, and I am still in a thinking stage of planning.   I have pages of topics and experiences to write about - that list will continue to grow.  Plus pages of chapter title ideas and content of each chapter, along with lists of purposes of the book and goals of the book.    I am kind of excited to be doing this.   

Nearly 1,000,000 Files Gone

In yet another stage of Letting Go of ALL, tonight, I deleted well over 900,000 files (nearly 3T = 3,000GB).   It was not easy, but I have clear peace about it.    And I know what God has told me, and I know that I am not to lean on my own understanding.  If He has asked me very clearly to do it, and I don't understand it, that doesn't opt me from doing it.  

This picture is the highest number I could get.  

It was just about to 1,000,000 when it started deleting them.  

Time Is Fly'n

Wow, as busy as I thought I was, I am amazed.  My speech is done and my 5+ page paper for History is finished, an it's still morning on Tuesday.  Plus at least half of the garage sale items are priced and set up in the garage already!   Wow this week is going great already!  God is so Good to me!

Letting go of ALL

This post has been due for a while.   Below is something that that I've been going through over the past few months that I have kept off my blog and have shared with few people.   This has occupied much of my life, time and prayer over the past few months, especially in recent weeks.   And it starts and ends (and everything in between) with God.

Over the past two years, especially the past year, God has been taking me step by step on having me let go of my Stuff.   --> I like my stuff.  a month or two ago God took this challenge to another level.  I felt that God challenged me to get rid of everything.   I spent a long while, even up to today, praying, asking God 1) is this really you God and 2) what do you mean by "Everything"? Weeks of praying this resulting in the same thing.  Every time I asked, "what is everything?" I heard, "Everything."   I started asking God specifics.   "do I sell my clothes that still fit me that I wear on and off?"   To which He replied, "Is that part of everything?"  I said, "Well technically they are part of everything I own, but..."  He replied with, "[get red of] everything."   Time after time I kept noticing confirmations that this was Him.  Then when my phone was "wiped" that made it final. Well, before I get there, there's another piece that has been really challenging to me.   While on my way home from school one night, I was pondering what giving up everything would look like.   I hypothetically pondered what it would look like if I gave up my laptop (which I use multiple times daily).   I finally concluded to myself that, "no, I couldn't give up my laptop."  Just at that moment I heard God say, "I want you to sell your laptop."    That took me into a deeper more "serious" time with Him and all sorts of questions.   I finally got to the point that I was willing to give up my laptop, except my biggest "fear" was losing my files.   I have journals, notes, encouragements, things God's told me and much more that I find very valuable.   That was a huge challenge, and I kept feeling God say to wipe my files and rid my laptop.   Then back to my phone being wiped.

   As I was sitting in the Sprint Store the first time, God revealed how the phone related to what I was going through.  It was almost a sign that I could chose to wipe my files or I could not, and they would be wiped when I least expected it and when it would be a lot harder for me.   So as I was sitting there, I asked God that if this was Him and this is what He was saying, that they (Sprint) would not be able to recover the data that was lost on my phone.  And after hours of work, nothing from Sprint.  And it gave me great joy and peace.   Joy and peace beyond what I can explain, it was so all God.  

Well after that, I came home and started taking all the close out of my closet and putting them on the table for our upcoming garage sale.   I had complete peace about it.    I then have started going through my computer and deleting files from it.    While cleaning out nearly Everything in my room, I created a stack of papers, notebooks, journals and such that I really didn't want to git rid of.   After I had surrendered to God, He allowed me to email my journals and such to myself and put them on Google Drive (for now) so they will be there when my laptop is gone.  However that's not that easy to do with paper copies.    I have journals (general, deep and personal, and all so much more), notes from church, notes from events and conferences and groups, all my SLI notes, and much valued pieces of paper.  

But God challenged me yet again.  He showed me how I have been trying to hold onto these great things and hold onto them and have God encourage me and work through me via these papers and notes.  Except God said, 'I don't want you to seek me through those, I want you to seek me (Period)."   The picture I got of this situation was that I have two broken legs and I have a walker to hold me up.  This walker is these notes, journals, words from God, and encouragements.  God's telling me to take  a step of faith and let go.  Let go of the walker and let Him hold me up.   That's hard.    I was hoping He would let me keep these in the end.

However tonight on my way home from class, I had yet another chat about this with Him and He made it very clear to me that He want's me to get rid of Everything, including my notes, journals and such.  It was so clear and I had such peace about it, no matter how hard it was to think about, when I got home I went right to work.  I got a big garbage bag and one by one, and stack by stack, dumped all my journals, notes, encouragements, written words from God, SLI notes, Conference notes, Church notes, life notes, Life journals, bible studies, personal devotions, bible studies and all that, that I have been holding on to more than I'm holding on to God.  I dumped it all in the garbage.  It was hard, and I know that I will have times where I will look back and wish that I had such and such notes or journal or thought, but I also know the peace and joy that I have in this, and the clarity of God speaking to me on this, saying He has something far greater for me.

I am getting rid of almost everything because of this calling.   I am still praying that God will allow me to keep 3.8 sets of clothes rather than one set.  But as of right now, it's just one set that I am keeping, the rest is on the garage sale.   I asked God if I can keep my phone and He said yes.  I believe that part of this is because I went through something like this prior to getting my phone.  I did not want it for various reasons, and (thankfully) because of that I am not that all attached to it.   I asked God if I could keep my bible and He said yes.  I asked Him if I should get rid of my car and He said, "You can keep your car for now, but be ready to give it up at a moments notice."   Whatever He means by that???   --- Just hold it loosely someone told me.    So, I am selling literally everything I own, except my car, phone, bible, a few toiletries (razor, tooth brush, comb), my passport, and a few papers that God has allowed me to keep for one reason or another, oh, and my backpack and school stuff.   Other than that, everything I own is for sale or in the garbage - a lot was burned last week.

However "selling" my stuff to me is not for the money.   I know that God will take care of me just as He has always done and as He has said He will do.   I trust that without a doubt.    I asked God as I was pricing things to give me prices.  I priced them at the price that I heard, when I heard a price.   Some are way high, and some are way low.  I do not know if the high ones are because He wants me to keep them for something else, or He has someone who will pay that much for them.  I am praying for direction of what to do with the money I get too.  At this point, I am hearing to give every dollar.    And for the things that are priced way low, well someone is going to be blessed.   I am praying that everyone who comes to the garage sale this weekend, will be blessed.   There are over 5 boxes of Free stuff (nice stuff too) and lots of nice cheap stuff.    God has a plan far greater than I can see or understand, but I am trusting Him that He will work His will and His kingdom will advance.    God works all things together for good for those who love Him - Romans 8:28